The marvel that is your hair...

Little Miss Emily--
Ok, let's talk for a minute about your hair. Have you any idea how often I think about your hair? It is a marvel to me.
The moment you were born, with this head of dark messy hair -- and it stood up all over and went every single direction -- and every time I looked at you, your hair was this kind of shock to me. It's nice how it so completely distinguishes you from the boys -- the little bald babies that they were.
Your hair is a wonder to me -- it's curly when it's wet, it grows vertically in the back and it dries straight up on the top. Where did this come from? The nurse in the hospital asked if you looked like your daddy, and I oh so innocently said "yes" -- and then she asked if he was Hispanic or Asian...
Your hair is so uniquely you -- different from us, but wild and incredibly sweet -- and it just makes me smile. I am sure in years to come we will have "issues" with it, trying to decide if it should be long or short, in a ponytail or down, braided or curled....and I'm sure between the two of us we will never be able to come across the right barrette or bow or elastic band...but I am so looking forward ot it all.
For now I am content to stare at the marvel that is your hair...and think of how divine you are.
Snugs my little cupcake,
Mommy

Always you...

My three little chickadees--
Everyone is asleep tonight under the same roof. I don't know why this is such a big deal to me, but truly it is. I like you here--where I can see you and touch you and kiss your foreheads.
I pray sweetest little dreams for you tonight as you rest your weary heads. Last week was a long week, but tonight you rest...
The summer is stretched out in front of us and I see opportunity everywhere. Things we should do, places we should go. Goals that I have for us. You will learn about me that I have big ideas, but poor follow-through. Lots of goals, but not so great on the execution. It's one of the things that worries me about parenting you. I hope that I am enough for you. I hope that I am not blindly leading you astray--not keeping tight enough, or loose enough reins...or that I am doing both -- too tight and too loose, but mostly all wrong. I only have one chance to do this with each of you and I so badly want to do this right.
You are each these amazing creations...I want so desparately for you to each know how truly you are loved. I want to KNOW each of you. I think that deep within each of us is a desire to be truly known for who we are, and to be loved because of it. I want you to all get that feeling from me, that you will be able to say "she really knows who I am."
I love you my three little bugs. The way you talk and laugh and delight in each other. I love Jake, that you were so excited today for Emily when she was pushing herself up off her blanket. You were clapping and cheering for her, and her smiled shined so bright for you. She was so enthralled and captivated by you.
I am so enthralled and captivated by you, by each of you, by all of you.
Always you...

Mommy